The Magic of Play Therapy

I worked as a Child Aide for the Early Mental Health Intervention program for 12 years. This was a school based program based on the non-directive play therapy. I worked with at-risk students from k-6 grades. This was a very satisfying work experience which taught me not only play therapy techniques but  parenting skills and helped me grow as a person. I would like to share some of my experiences from time to time. I have changed the names of the children for maintaining confidentiality.

One day I walked into the staff lounge and heard a teacher describing her new first grade student. “Sara would not do anything in the class. She even refuses to sit on the chair, forget about doing any work. She is not talking, nor participating in any activity. She does not even want to go out and play. This is going on for a week. I don’t know what to do.”  Clearly this was a student perfectly fit for our program. I decided to enroll her and the teacher agreed. Two days later I went to pick up Sara. When I entered the classroom, I saw her sitting in a far corner while other students were sitting in a circle at the front of the classroom. I approached her and introduced myself. She did not look up or acknowledge me. I decided to wait for her response. After 5 minutes she still was not willing to look at me. At that point I decided not to push her to come to the playroom today. I told her that I will be back next week and left. Next week I took a small puppet with me when I went to pick up Sara. This time she was sitting in her chair, head down. She was withdrawn from the rest of the class. I approached her slowly, reminded her about who I am and showed her the puppet. She looked at the puppet for one minute. I asked her if she would be interested in coming with me to the playroom. She did not respond. I sat by her side and after some time asked her again, offering my hand. To my surprise she got up and we walked to the playroom.

Once inside, Sara stood in the middle of the room; stunned, silent. I told her,” You can play with many different toys in many ways. You get to decide what you want to do. I am not going to tell you what to do.”  Sara stood in the middle of the room, looking around. Her face was still neutral, almost sad, uninterested in her surroundings. I waited for her to decide what she wants to do. Sara did not say a word. I was feeling very nervous. I did not know what to do except, just be there for her and let her lead. I acknowledged her feeling that sometimes it’s hard to make a choice. After 10 minutes, Sara was still standing in the middle of the room. Her eyes started to well up, she looked sad, anxious and nervous. It was very clear that she was uncomfortable and did not want to play. I gave her a choice of returning to the classroom. She nodded.  I dropped her off, and told her that I will be back next week, same time. This was a learning experience for me. For the first time I came across a child who was very shy, sad and full of anxiety. It is rare that a child does not touch a single toy in the playroom. I consulted my supervisor about Sara and he told me to stay the course. My job was to be consistent and provide her support just by being with her. Next week I took another puppet with me and Sara came with me without extra prompting. She acknowledged me by looking at me. Her anxiety seemed low. In the playroom she doodled with markers and wanted to leave after 15 minutes. There was no interaction between us, she hardly said anything. This continued for 2 more session. By each session Sara looked a bit more comfortable. She was giving me faint smile or a nod sometimes. It took 7 sessions for Sara to stay for the whole time (30 minutes). By the tenth session she was talking, laughing and interacting with me while exploring the play room. At the end of our 15 sessions, Sara wrote me note thanking me for being her “Special friend”.  That note brought tears to my eyes and filled my heart with warmth. By this time Sara had a few friends, was doing her classwork and interacting with the teacher. It was amazing to see the transformation. The power of non-directive play therapy was at work and it worked magic!